Wake Up From This Winter

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So wake up from this winter

Into the world of all things new
I feel you drawing nearer
Because I know your love is on the move

Three months into my sabbatical, I am happy to report that slowing down is one of the best things I have ever done. This whole summer — and now into fall — I have simplified, eliminated and evaluated much in my life and heart. Lots of reading, writing, talking, thinking, crying and learning.

And God has met me at every turn. Whether it’s been through financial provision that lets me continue my journey or flashes of revelation on a piece of holy ground, I have experienced nothing but the kindness of God. He isn’t the harsh schoolmaster I was expecting. He is a gentle Father, carefully and patiently allowing me to grow at a safe pace.

Instead of running away from pain, I have been learning to see Jesus walking with me in the midst of my suffering. He is the “suffering servant.” He doesn’t wait for me to be whole, He comes to me in my brokenness. That’s the gospel.

Instead of ignoring my questions, I have been learning to wrestle with God and ask Him my why’s and how’s. He is mighty and strong and unshakeable. He can handle my toughest questions and my hardest punches.

Instead of trying to understand God’s plan for my life, I have been learning to surrender my relentless desire for details to a God who knows and cares and loves. If I replace “need to know plans” with “need to know Jesus” then I get what my heart is actually craving. Seek first Jesus, the rest will follow.

Instead of filling my days with “stuff,” I have been learning to sit still and only choose what is best. Which is sometimes sitting on the back porch with a cup of tea and my Bible. Or playing the guitar with a 3 year old. Or sleeping in past 9am. If God has given me this time, I should use it to it’s fullest and not feel guilty about it. Rest. Enjoy. See Jesus.

It’s amazing. And refreshing. And freeing. But I had to slow down to experience it. God knew I needed this time even more than I did. 

Like a eager flower daring to bloom after a long winter, Lydia 2.0 is slowly emerging.

 

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“On The Move” Lyrics and Music by Thomas McGuire. Check out noisetrade.com/thomasmcguire to get this song for free!

 

Lessons From Oregon

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The Willamette Valley in Oregon is easily one of the most peaceful and breathtaking places God created. The rolling hills paint a bluish-green border around the city, highlighted by a handful of brilliant, snow-capped peaks. Everywhere you look there are fir trees, roses, wildflowers and gardens. Wheat whitens and berry bushes offer themselves under the golden sun.

Oregon is the place is where summer becomes a bride, fully arrayed in her best and beautiful hues, making all things lovely as she dances and twirls and sings. She makes the simple moments glitter with sweetness and meaning. My favorite memories these three weeks happened while sitting on back decks, standing on tops of hills, sharing over meals, riding in cars, chatting at cafes and gazing at stars.

In both the busyness and the quiet of these past three weeks, God spoke to me. He used conversations, sermons and personal study to fill my heart with His truth. Simple, golden, sweet – just like an Oregon summer.

Here are some of the truths that I have been pondering:

1) The gospel is still the main thing – No matter what else I learn or hear or say, the gospel is what I always, always, always need. The gospel – the birth, life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ – is what frees me from sin, fear of man and isolation. The gospel informs my decisions, my suffering, my future and my identity. Without it’s defining, unalterable truths, I would be lost in my own twisted understandings.

2) God will speak when it’s time – Just as He sent the ravens to feed Elijah, God will provide morsels of truth when I need them. I need not worry or strive. They will come.

3) God is jealous for me – He wants my first, my best, my all and He is willing to pursue my life and alter my circumstances in order to draw me to Himself. What would happen if I directed all of my energies into the one relationship that mattered most?

4) God gives guidance as we move – The Shepherd is always guiding and leading; it’s His initiative and His commitment. My role is to rise and go, walking in what I know to be true and trusting His hand to guide me as I move. I can rest in His character, taking my time in each phase because I know that He will get me where He wants me to go.

5) God redeems pain – Our world is full of broken, cheating, lying, selfish, sick, grieving, angry, uncontrollable people. But there in the midst of the sorrow and wreckage, you’ll find Jesus, our sympathizer and caretaker. He is restoring what has been damaged, healing what has been broken, redeeming what has been lost.

6) God will root out spiritual pride — Our theology or experience can make us proud and blind. How easy it is to hold our freedoms, knowledge or understandings over one another as the banner implanted on the moral high ground. God is in the process of purifying His church. “True church reform doesn’t add layers but rather removes them in order to reveal the original foundation underneath. While false teachers add doctrine and complications, Jesus is rinsing His church off with His word, making the truth about Himself simple and clear.” (Gregg Harris)

I am halfway through my sabbatical. Three weeks down, three weeks to go. I’m amazed at all the adventures and lessons that can be packed into such a short amount of time. Please be praying for me as I continue to rest, wait, seek and learn.

P.S. Feel free to track my travels via photos on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram! 

Lord, I Need You

The smooth smell of honeysuckles fills the air as the breeze swings the patio curtains on their rods.

My heart feels congested. So eager to breathe, but still so cluttered. I close my eyes, trying to get the fresh air clear my thoughts. All I get is a whiff of the sweet, summer flowers.

Here, under this little vine-covered nook I was going to write about my heart and questions and needs. But I feel like the Holy Spirit has stopped me and asked me just to be still. To sit. To think. To pray. To cry. To smile. To smell. To wait. To seek Jesus.

“Lord, I come, I confess
Bowing here I find my rest
Without You I fall apart
You’re the One that guides my heart

Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You

Where sin runs deep Your grace is more
Where grace is found is where You are
And where You are, Lord, I am free
Holiness is Christ in me

Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You

Teach my song to rise to You
When temptation comes my way
And when I cannot stand I’ll fall on You
Jesus, You’re my hope and stay

Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You”